Thursday, July 1, 2010

Starting Again

New blog, new posts and no one reading it! This is how I like it. I like the solitude of my blog, writing everything I want to. No hesitations, no worrying what others might think, it's just me and my thoughts. I know I should have just bought a diary to make it more private, the internet is pretty much open to anyone, but it's much more easier to type than hand write it.

My first blog http://siyamnuwebenine.blogspot.com are being read by some of my family members. I guess it's my fault since I linked it to my facebook account. Now I seem to can't write anything there without being judged. I did write some pretty mean stuff about some of my family, but I can't help it when I'm frustrated or annoyed. Everyone feels that, they just don't write about it publicly I guess. I had the blog for a year and no one comments on it or reads it, that made me complacent. For sure no one in my family would even bother, or so I thought.

My cousin got the linked on my facebook account (learned my lesson), she read I guess maybe all of it, until she got to the post where I wrote mean stuff about my aunt. Then she told her mom about it, and her mom told her sister about it and they read it. They actually can't believe that I wrote those stuff. Then my cousin told my sister about that post. Then just this March, I and my sister had a fight, she told my mom and my aunt (the one who I wrote about) about that post. That's when I found out that they have been reading it. I was dumbstruck. The funny thing is, I didn't regret writing it, I regretted publicizing it!

Just a while ago, I wanted to write again about how annoyed I was at home. But I can't. With my previous blog, I don't have the luxury of being honest to myself. I would have sugar coated it but I want to use my own words without any facade. Just pure honest no matter how mean I would sound.

I don't know if I should delete my previous blog. It's been a year and a half since I started it and I had lots of posts there. I guess I'll think about it. For the meantime, it'll be just hanging around the net.

(decision: delete blog)

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